Forced Myself to Say Yes to All Plans; Got Me Off Phone, Made Friends

As a preschool teacher, I’m constantly encouraging my students to try new things.

I’ll suggest they to do a puzzle with a kid they haven’t played with before or maybe try painting instead of racing toy cars again. Sometimes, I’ll ask if they want to abandon the slides and explore the garden and all its wonders instead.

At first, these suggestions are almost always rejected. Students feel shy, skeptical, and too comfortable with the familiar.

However, because kids are hardwired to be curious and adventurous, they soon branch out. They say yes. And the pay-off is immediate as they experience the joys of meeting someone new, trying something new, and going somewhere new.

My preschoolers were doing much better than me.

In the years following the COVID-19 lockdowns, asking someone out for plans felt daunting, new activities sounded intimidating, and expanding my horizons seemed unsettling.

What if people didn’t want to hang out with me? What if I tried something new and I was bad at it? What if I ventured out of the house and didn’t like it?

However, boredom and restlessness got the best of me. I eventually grew weary from scrolling through Instagram Reels, cycling through the same hangout spots, and typing out a text inviting someone to an event with me only to erase it with a sigh.

It was time to do what I’d done with my kids: push myself to say yes to new experiences.

Saying yes to new people expanded my circle

After moving for college, grad school, and work, my circle of friends were dispersed around the country. To make new friends locally, I needed to intentionally say yes.

I widened my network with birthday parties and Galentine’s Day events and, from there, I said yes to all the invites and other gatherings that followed.

Karaoke, clothing swaps, bar crawls, I said yes. It didn’t matter if I was tired or if I didn’t really know the person who invited me or if plans fell through and had to be rescheduled several times — I kept saying yes.

Quickly, I remembered how great it feels to be around others. Slowly, I found my people and built up my circle of friends.

As I said yes to new places and experiences, I began to see opportunities all around me